Woofloose
by Kayonoi
Summary: Naruto bans dancing unless Kiba can learn to dance! Kiba goes to find some help... but is he getting more then he asked for? TemxOC, future KibaxTem Review please!
1. The Big Contest

The Big Contest

Kiba was sitting offstage. The eighteen-year-old dog-boy was rather excited for his shot at the dance floor. He had been practicing for hours! Of course, this was an excellent feat for somebody like him.

Lee was on stage now, dancing his heart out. Kiba never really understood why the young sixth Hokage, Naruto, would hold a dance-off. He never really understood Naruto, anyway, so nothing was new.

Lee had finished, and walked off stage. Next up was Kiba. Kiba walked on stage, grinning. Oh, did I forget to mention that Gaara was MC-ing?

"Alright, here's one of Konoha's Homedogs, and I mean that as literally as possible, Inuzuka Kiba!" Gaara said, as gangstery as possible.

Gaara mashed play on an expensive jam-box, which started playing "Who Let the Dogs Out". Kiba sure had a one-track mind.

To avoid the following images entering your head and causing you to puke out your nose, ears, eyes, and any other bodily openings, the following dance scene with Kiba's horrible dance skills will be replaced with Gaara tap-dancing.

Gaara goes tap dances!

Temari is mortally wounded! Temari collapsed!

Kankuro is mortally wounded! Kankuro collapsed!

You lose…

END REPLACEMENT SCENE!

Everybody ran off to the bathrooms to puke out of there everything, and Kiba was left on stage. Gaara, stuck in the DJ booth, took out his gourd and vomited into it.

"Agh! Kiba, what the hell was that?" Naruto yelled.

"Um… d-dancing?" Kiba said, with a little bit of tears in his eyes.

"I call that 'Raping the minds of everybody by doing something that resembles raping a chicken!'" Naruto shouts, "And from now on, to save everybody from this horror, I will BAN DANCING in Konoha, until you can learn to dance!"

"BAN DANCING?" Gaara shouts, "But… What will I do when I have free time?"

"Gaara… chill, man." Naruto said, "You don't even live here."

"Oh yeah…" Gaara said, "Well, later, foo's!" Gaara takes his leave.

"I wasn't that bad, was I?" Kiba asked Naruto.

"Dude, you were totally off the wa-hizzle, a'ight?" Naruto said.

-

Kiba sat glumly at the Ramen shop, looking over at a couple on the other side of the chairs.

One was Temari of Suna, and the other was a guy with spikey red hair, dressed in mostly black, his Suna headband on his forehead. The back of his jacket said "Sen, Super Break Dancer, foo!" Kiba assumed he could breakdance. He also remembered Temari was one of the best dancers at the Dance off… Perhaps he could ask for tutoring from the two… of course, after they got their tongues out of eachother's throats.

Kiba slowly moved over to a chair beside them, and Temari looked at him.

"Oh great…" Temari said, "It's that guy who made everybody barf out of their pores…"

"Hey man, learn to dance!" Sen said.

"Yeah… um… I was just going to ask you guys… Since you two are both great dancers… could you teach me a few moves?" Kiba asked.

Sen whispered something in Temari's ear, and she chuckled a bit.

"Alright, mutt-face," Temari said, "We'll teach you how to dance."

"Alright!" Kiba said.

"Meet us over at the training grounds tomorrow at three." Sen said, "And wear loose clothing, y'know, something that you can move around in."

"Great! But, how will I pay you?" Kiba asked.

"Oh, well… how about you do everything we say until you learn how to dance?" Temari said.

"What? No way!" Kiba shouted back.

"Fine then, no dance lessons." Sen said.

"Alright, alright!" Kiba said, "I'll do whatever you say…"

"First, you have to call me Captain Awesome." Sen said, grinning.

"And you have to let me feed you veggies!" Temari said, knowing the dog-boy's one weakness.

"V-veggies?" Kiba said, nervously, "A-alright… I can… d-deal with… th-th-th-that…"

"Great. We'll see you tomorrow at three." Sen said.

-

Yah! Chapter one of Woofloose, written! Don't worry, I'm still writing Of Dogs and Men, but I just can't think of what to put for the next and last chapter… Sorry homies. I mean, dogs… guys… people…


	2. It Begins

It Begins

Kiba awoke the next morning around ten AM. Akamaru was already up, and he had a note I his mouth for Kiba. Kiba looked at it, still groggy from his sleep.

_Dear Inuzuka Kiba_

_I, Uzumaki Naruto, the sixth Hokage, have issued a show for which you will be performing in. It is in two months, so learn how to dance!_

_The types of dances I would like you to do are: Break-dance, Modern Dance, Techno, Hip-hop, and Ballet. For Modern and Ballet, you must have a FEMALE dance partner. For Break-dance, you must have a partner, male or female._

_Kthxbai_

_Uzumaki Naruto, Sixth Hokage_

Kiba fully awoke once he read the line about Ballet. "B-ballet?" Kiba said.

-

Temari and Sen were sitting at the training grounds, waiting for Kiba. He was late.

"Hey, Temmy," Sen said, "Do you think he's actually gonna show?"

Temari shrugged. "Beats me, Sen. I just hope he doesn't turn out to be some kind of pervert."

Sen laughed. "Heh… I know you'd like a bit pervertedness and dirty-speak…" he said.

Temari glared at her boyfriend. "I already told you, Sen! Not until we're married!"

"So we're going to get married?"

"No! I mean… Yes! I mean… Maybe… probably not." Temari said.

Sen moaned.

-

Kiba had finally arrived. He showed the note to Temari.

"Partners? Ballet?" Sen said, reading over Temari's shoulder, "That's hysterical!"

Temari smacked Sen. "Baka! You know I like Ballet!" she said.

"S-sorry, Temmy-kun…" he said.

"So, Temari-san, Se-I mean, Captain Awesome," Kiba said, "Are you going to be able to teach me all of this in two months?"

Temari shrugged. "Of course we can. We can even be your dance partners." She said. She then noticed Kiba's eyes. "Kiba… up… my face is up here…" She then slapped him.

"Ow…" Kiba groaned, rubbing his swore cheek.

"Alright then, let's get down to business." Sen said.

-

After a while, Kiba had actually made a bit of progress. "Wow Kiba. For a guy, you sure pick up the basics of Ballet pretty quickly." Temari commented.

"B-ballet?" Kiba said, "I thought we were working on Techno first!"

"Damn, you're dumb." Sen said, "Can't even tell the difference between techno and ballet!"

Sen started doing the robot, while Temari pranced about.

"Oh… Now I get it." Kiba said, doing the robot, poorly, along with Sen, "Look at me! I'm doing ballet!"

-

After a few more hours, Kiba finally learned which style was which.

They had finished Ballet for the day, and started working on Modern.

"Kiba, do you have any songs for Modern that you could learn to dance to?" Temari asked.

"I've written my own music and recorded it with my guitar." He said, placing the CD into the stereo.

Sen covered his ears. If Kiba's musical skills were at all as good as his original dance skills, things would be bad.

The intro played. It was actually pretty good.

"Kiba, this is actually a pretty good song." Temari said.

"Really?" Kiba asked, "I worked pretty hard on this."

"Y'know, if you'd put this much effort into your dancing, you'd be totally amazing!" Sen said.

They practiced a bit more, Kiba still not making much progress. What were they to do?

Temari got an idea. "Kiba, why don't you choreograph your song and come up with some lyrics for the show?" she asked, "And then teach it to us and we'll dance with you."

"Really?" Kiba asked.

"Yeah." Sen said, "In fact, it may be the only way to get to actually start dancing right!"

"Awesome! Thanks, guys!" he said.

"Anyway, time for you to pay up…" Temari said, taking out a paper bag. Kiba started sniffing. Inside of it was something so menacing… He tried to make a run for it, but Sen held him down.

"N-no! Don't do it!" Kiba yelled, "I'll do anything!"

Temari smirked. She reached her hand into the bag, and pulled out a carrot.

Kiba started screaming like a little girl.

Temari pushed it towards Kiba's mouth, which he clamped shut. Sen grabbed his jaw, forcing it open as Temari slid the carrot in his mouth. Sen made Kiba bite down, and kept his mouth shut as Kiba let out muffled cries. He swallowed. His eyes started spinning around and he fainted.

"Huh." Sen said, "Well… you don't see that every day."

-

Yay! Chapter two! This time, PLEASE REVIEW! I got none for the first chapter… I feel so unloved…

Kiba: You horrible monster! You made me eat veggies!

Yeah… well, you didn't eat any in the other stories I've written about you, so I felt like some torture.

Kiba: But you tortured me so much in Of Dogs and Men! You're a horrible man!

I'm only fourteen!

Kiba: Whatever! I quit!

He'll be back… I've got his… soul… in a… jar.


	3. The Song that Goes Like This

The Song that Goes Like This

Alright, this chapter has a musical number, courtesy of the hit Broadway musical, "SPAMalot". If you haven't seen the show… go to New York… or Toronto… whatever…

-

Kiba was standing near the waterfall out in the forest. Could he ever learn to dance in time for the show? They had practicing for almost a month, and Kiba had barely made any progress. He sighed.

The Inuzuka began to think of Hinata, and his jealousy and hatred of the Hokage. It seemed like just yesterday he had almost kissed her. Of course, it was an accident that they even got into that position.

_Kiba and Hinata were on there way back from a mission, and had to camp out for the night. Hinata was asleep, her head next to Akamaru, and Kiba was standing guard._

_He watched the Hyuuga sleep. It seemed like such a calm sleep, and Kiba wished he could just rest his eyes. But he had stubbornly demanded that he stand guard all night._

_He walked over to her lazily. Except, he tripped over the remains of the fire, falling flat onto Hinata, his face meeting hers. Hinata woke up with a scream, seeing Kiba right in her face, smacked right on top of her wasn't the first thing she wanted to see._

_Their lips were dangerously close. Getting closer because of Kiba's attempts, making it look like he was just falling a bit more._

_"Kiba, get off of me!" Hinata yelled, "Your breath stinks! When was the last time you brushed your teeth?"_

_Kiba had to think hard about that question. "S-sorry, Hinata…" he said as he got off of her, sad that they had almost kissed but didn't._

Remembering these thoughts made Kiba want to… to… sing. He hoped there was nobody around… But little did he know, a certain Sand nin was watching him.

Kiba felt like he could hear music in his ears. "_Once, in ev'ry show, there comes a song like this._" he began, "_It starts off soft and low, and ends up with a kiss. Oh where, is the son, that goes like this?_

Temari emerged from the bushes, leaving a very surprised Kiba. "_A sentimental song, that casts a magic spell, They all will hum along. We'll over-act like hell. Oh this, is the song, that goes like this._"

Kiba smiled, getting the drift of what was going on. He never knew his life was a musical. "_Now we can go straight into the middle eight, a bridge that is to far for me!"_

"_I'll sing it in your face, while we both embrace,_" Kiba then hugged Temari, both of them singing now, "_And then, we change, the Key!_"

Kiba then let out in a very high voice, "_Now we're into E! _** Ahem**_, that's awfully high for me…_"

"_But everyone can see, we should've stayed in D._"

"_For this is our song, that goes like this._"

"_I'm feeling very proud!_" sang Kiba.

"_You're singing far too loud._"

"_That's the way that this song goes,_"

"_You're standing on my toes._"

"_Singing our song, that goes like this!_"

"_I can't believe there's more!_" Temari complained.

"_It's far too long I'm sure…_"

"_That's the trouble with this song, it goes on and on and on._"

"_For this, is our song, that is too long!_"

"_We'll be singing this till dawn!_" Temari belted.

"_You'll wish that you weren't born!_

"_Let's stop this damn refrain,_"

"_Before we go insane! The song always ends like thiiiiiiiiiiiiis!_"

Temari, now very tired of this song, shoved her tongue into Kiba's mouth, Kiba, like most men, getting the idea and following suit.

"Wow Temari…" Kiba said, "I didn't know you felt that way about me."

"I didn't either." Temari said, "Damn, you can sing."

"Thanks." Kiba said modestly, something new to him.

"No, I mean really good. Like professionally."

Kiba blushed.

"So, what do you want to do?" Temari asked.

"Sex." Kiba said quickly as the two fell into the bushes.

-

Yeah, I know, this chapter didn't have much to it… but I didn't know what to write so I had them sing. xD Hooray for musicals.

Sen: Hey! Temari cheated on me AND sang!

Well… yes. I also know that the inspiration for you, my friend Ben, hates musicals, so I cut you out of the chapter. Hahahaha. MUHAHAHAHAHAHA!


End file.
